Conclusion: I am a jerk

So today I did a video chat with my friends in OC, I have not done any video chat with a friend for a long time, the only time I do video chat is to see my lovely nephew and niece.

Then I make a statement that being single should have the most fun, which is a philosophy that I always believe in, but my friend thought that being single will make you more selfish.

Is a world about you, not anybody else anymore.

But what's wrong with loving yourself more?

You become more picky, and end up single forever become very likely.

Possible.

And he said I should ask someone what they think about me.

And I did.

Then now I am sitting in front of my computer feeling uneasy.

I don't remember when was the last time I ask someone what do they think about me. Not how do I look tonight, how's my dress?

So it turns out, I am a jerk after all, just like anybody else.

Maybe being by myself all these time really got into me, but I am still out there, not completely defensive about everything, not yet.

But for the first time in my life, I am in good shape when I am on my own.

Everybody grow up, eventually. People can't be energetic all the time, especially when they get older.

So I can't have someone to grow together with me and still keep up with my living style and pace.

I don't get tired, and I always want more than what someone can offer. I want to be still spontaneous and I want to take control over things. Is getting harder to do so when people around you are moving to another level. When people spend most of their time compromising.

Or I am moving to another level, they just stay on the same place?

Ok, I don't even know what am I writing about anymore but I think, in conclusion, I am a jerk in many ways.

And I never thought of that, that's amazing.